Looking back by J.Hansley

Looking back by J.Hansley

They say there’s no point looking back as there’s nothing you can do to change the past if there are things you regret, and there’s nothing you can do to bring the past back to life, but I would disagree in some ways as I enjoy reminding myself of how life used to be when I was younger. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not one of those people who love to go on ad nauseam about ‘the good old days’ but there are moments when the past springs into the present.

It´s often a smell that will remind me of a particular place or person. I’m sure everyone will agree that the olfactory sense is the most sensitive. A perfume, the scent of a flower, baking bread, bonfires … they all conjure up an instant picture.  For me it would have to be the smell of a freshly painted room. We moved so many times when I was younger and each time the first thing my parents would do is decorate our bedrooms. The windows would be flung open to get rid of the smell of the paint but it would always linger on for days. Even today it fills me with a sense of new beginnings.

As for music, whenever I hear a familiar piece of music I can remember exactly where I was and with whom and I can often remember a lot of the lyrics as well. Perhaps we used to pay more attention in those days or perhaps I just used to spend more time listening to music than I do today. Listening to Bob Dylan, Joni Mitchell or Queen, and I’m immediately in my old bedroom doing my homework, wishing I could be a rock star.

Those memories are fleeting. They come and go so quickly but when I visit the seaside resort where we used to spend many of our family holidays, I can replay entire days in my head. I’ll walk along the beach and I can vividly remember the weather, the salty smell of the sea, our dogs playing in the water, an ice cream if we were lucky and that feeling of exhaustion after a day in the fresh air. The summer holidays seemed to go on for ever.

Although have lots of photos of those days, I rarely look at them as I prefer to allow my memory to create the pictures. It’s very different today as we are so snap-happy; we can so easily capture the present with our phones and cameras, upload the images and within minutes we can share that moment with all our friends on Facebook. For me that somehow takes away the unique connection.